This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
