i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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