aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
