Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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