You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize