Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I could fuck to npr.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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