it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
