She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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