Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
