It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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