The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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