just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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