How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
