She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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