tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
