I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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