you guys were way drunker than both of me
She announced her abortion via fbk
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
