We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
