Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
