well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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