And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
sex in a hospital.. check
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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