Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
