Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize