doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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