Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Operation Purity has been aborted
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
