are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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