So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
my nose is crying tears of wow.
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