"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
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