I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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