your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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