All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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