She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
