I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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