another moral hangover. fuck.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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