Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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