PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
