everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
i've created a new STD.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
