Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Randomize
