Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize