no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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