Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?

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(614): View more from Ohio

...is it true? will i see you next weekend

(248): View more from Michigan

YES.

(614): View more from Ohio

ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us

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(253): View more from Washington

dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in

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(847): View more from Illinois

hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.

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(260): View more from Indiana

I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.

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(786): View more from Florida

I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.

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