dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
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