am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
