just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
