I'd wear matching sweaters with you
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize