I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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