Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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