I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
did you just send me my own nude
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
