fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
