I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
