I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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